One of the most common questions asked when first meeting someone is “what do you do?”

Back when I was married and running my company, this question immediately launched me into my perfectly rehearsed (but natural sounding) elevator speech about my company. I never knew who I’d be talking to or if they could potentially turn into a client. So this “what do you do” question was a favorite of mine because people were impressed with my answer AND it often led to new clients (which meant… more profits!)

Upon getting a divorce and giving my ex my company… I had no idea how much I was going to struggle when asked this question.

I had, without realizing it…attached my entire identity to “what I did.” When I took away the small business owner / elevator speech, because it no longer fit, I found myself stumbling to even formulate words – let alone a response to the “what do you do” question.

I struggled with this question all summer long. And into the fall. For the November / December period of life nobody asked me. But it made me squirm every time someone asked. What did I do?

Today. As I write this, I’m at a lovely yoga / wellness retreat hotel in the jungle of Phuket, Thailand. People from all over the world come here for various reasons… but all are focused around something in the wheelhouse of wellness/healing/growth/fitness/detox/restart/elevate/relax etc.

Everyone here has a different story. A different reason for coming here. And yet, the pattern continues. The immediate question after “what’s your name” and “where are you from” is… “what do you do?”

Well guess what!?!?! It’s now one of my favorite questions to answer: “I’m retired,” I say with huge smile.

Gosh does that feel GOOD to say! And their reaction makes me smile even bigger. “Retired?! But you’re so young!” Yes, yes I am. Thanks for noticing 🤣😎

After they lift their jaw off the floor. The next question is either, “well how is that possible?” OR “where do you live?” Both questions are also fun to answer.

How is that possible? Well I worked my ass off building a company for 12 years and remodeling a house to build equity. Sold house (and gave Ex my half of business) and used proceeds from house in a way that generates enough passive income for me to live on. 🎤💥

Where do you live? Gosh I LOVE answering this question! I’m a nomad. I live wherever I am. Currently, I live here, at CC’s Hideaway in Phuket, Thailand. I travel year round. 💫(huge smile)

I’m so in love with my life now. I love what I do. I love where I live. I love that I’m growing daily. Elevating into a better version of myself. Learning more. Loving more. Trying more. Listening more. Giving more. Sharing more.

Realizing this – that what once was so gut wrenching and difficult for me to talk about (“what do you do?”) is now one of my favorite questions to answer just reaffirms to me how much progress I’m making. How much I’ve grown. How far I’ve come. I’m proud of myself. I’m filled with gratitude. I LOVE MY LIFE

UPDATE: June 1, 2023 – I’m back to hating this question! It’s literally NONE OF ANYONE’S BUSINESS and I feel like people only ask as a means of judging each other’s status level / achievement position in life. Let me tell you how I answer that question NOW. Person: “What do you do?” Me: “Uh. That’s such an uninteresting question. We could be talking about our favorite animals/tropical fruits/book/childhood game…those are way more interesting topics.” Usually this causes the question asker to retreat inward for a moment, and then, I volunteer my favorite fruit/animal/book/game whatever and smile, as I ask them for theirs.